The Puppet Girl
"You are a bad girl Matilda! How naughty
of you to say such cruel and dirty filth things about your father!
And then the worst, to blame him for them! Your father is the best
one in the world! He would never touch or harm you in any way Matilda!
Why, little missy, you are his golden haired princess and get more attention
from him then I ever do!"
"But Mommy, Daddy hurts me so bad and tells
me not to tattle on him because no one would believe me."
"Matilda Jane, if you do not quit lying to
me I will have to punish you!"
"Mommy, please believe me! Make Daddy
stop hurting me!"
"Enough of these lies! You stay in this closet until you quit
lying about your father!"
"No! No! Don't put me in there!
Voices talk to me! They put things into my head that are bad!
Mommy no, please, I love you! I won't be bad anymore! Mommy,
Slam. Total darkness.
Hush little baby now don't you cry
Hush little baby now don't cry
Hushlittle babynow don'tyou cry -
"You wait and see, the truth will come out
and all will pay for their meanness!"
* * * *
Golden rays of simulating warmth filled the
office of Doctor David Devils at the St. Michael's Children's Psychiatry
Institution. He had acquired his position due to his family holdings
and investments, but mostly because of the name. Head of St.
Michael's was a family tradition. Dr. David's grandfather,
Gerald Devils had establish the hospital. The story behind this had
remained a mystery, like hidden skeletons in the closet. He could
really care less, as long as he had a title, money, and a job. And
that Dr. David did. The atmosphere of the office was as isolated
and technical as the individual that sat behind the large, massive, wood
carved mahogany desk. The stark white of the walls glared as the
sun penetrated through the bay window that was centered in the middle of
it. The room, large and impersonal held two other objects of
furniture, a black metal filing cabinet and a black leather overstuffed
chair. Flipping through the files, Dr. David found the one
labeled Carol Marie Jacobs. She was the first patient he had really
had a bad encounter with. She was a very rebellious teenager with
a lot of hatred and confusion inside her. Dr. David was had
assigned Nurse Nelson to her case. If anyone could bring Carol Marie
around, it was her. Gathering his files, he headed for the third
floor nursing station.
Approaching the nursing station, Dr.
David quickly glanced at the figure behind the observation glass in the
Purple surveillance room. Very dainty and lady-like sat Carol Marie
playing tea party with her puppet. Carol Marie was delicate and tiny in
body structure. Her long golden ringlets carelessly framed her small
pointed face. Carol Marie's mouth was of the deepest crimson color
and rose-shaped. Her small upturned nose added a touch of rebellion
to her character. It was her large oval shaped, crystal blue eyes
that haunted Dr. Thelma. Carol Marie's eyes held no spirit
or live in them. They were dead and lifeless. For hours on
end, Carol Marie would stare into emptiness, like she was mesmerized or
in a hypnotic trance. This morning was the first time Dr. David
had seen any sign of life in Carol Marie. Reaching the nursing station,
Dr. David went behind the long triangular nursing desk that housed the
files and important document on all the patients on the third floor and
proceeded towards the conference room.
* * * *
"Oh puppet, I dream night after night about
me endlessly crying. My efforts to save myself are useless.
I awaken trembling and frightened. Then I dream of a image who is
hurting me! Oh, I try to stop it, but my screams are silenced by
his devilish laughter!"
"May I have some more cookies and tea Carol
Marie? They are so yummy!"
"Are you not listening to me! I said, I see an image, a
dark one, he seems so familiar, yet distorted. Let me think."
"Carol Marie you know who the dark image
is, admit it. It is your DADDY coming to get you again and again
"No! No! It is not my daddy!" Carol Marie
gasped horrified, "It can't be him, it just doesn't fit with who he is!
He is so sweet and loving, always dotting on me like I am his pretty little
princess! Stop it! Stop putting bad ideas in my head!".
"He will not go away or quit hurting you
until you kill him!"
* * * *
"Good morning Nurse Nelson and Nurse Bertha, I
am glad to see you are both here for shift report." said Dr. David.
Nurse Nelson was the day shift nurse.
She was dwarf like in appearance with stumpy arms and legs, which caused
her to wobble when she walked. She was soft-hearted and had all the
love in the world to give to the patients. Nurse Nelson was a nurturing,
motherly figure and worn her heart on her shoulders. Whenever any
patient needed that extra loving touch, Nurse Nelson was there, no matter
how aggressive or combative they were. Her words soothed all the
pain, hatred, and evil that existed in their abusive worlds. Nurse
Betha was the opposite. She was an obese, elderly women. Her
thinning white hair was pulled back into a very tight bun, giving her the
appearance of a stern, nasty person. Her eyes were deep set and had
tiny slits as openings. Her enormous potato nose gave her a manly
"If everything is in order nurses, I will
begin my patient status reports."
"Well, honestly, Dr. David there is a minor
matter of Carol Marie. See, she is not sleeping through out the night.
She is continually up, pacing the floor and talking to that puppet Nurse
Nelson gave her. It is like she believes that her puppet is alive
and talks to her like a normal human being. Then when the puppet
does not answer back, Carol Marie starts to freak out, beating on the puppet."
commented Nurse Bertha.
"Oh, Bertha, you are so temperamental.
Carol Marie would not harm anyone. She is a wounded child, hiding
from the world that has treated her badly. Well, if you would take
the time to get to know her, your opinion would change. It was just
yesterday that I took her in some gifts for her puppet. Carol Marie
was a perfect angel. Her and I played tea party all afternoon between
"You deal with her in the daylight.
I deal with her in the moonlight. She is a creature of the night!
She is up all night, pacing like a caged animal! And when she does
fall asleep, it is very restless. Then at 2:00 am rounds, I continually
hear this whimpering that turns into a blood curtling animal cry of pain!
Talk about scaring the bee-Jesus out of me!"
"Nurse Nelson, do you notice any changes in
Carol Marie doing the day?"
"No, she is always in the Purple Room playing tea party with the pupet
I gave her."
"Why did you give her that stupid puppet anyway
"It was a way of getting Carol Marie to open
up, to trust something. She is beginning a journey into the world
of repressed memories. She was intensely sexually abuse by her father
starting at a young age. Because she was so young and frightened
when it happened, Carol Marie has buried all memory of that abuse.
Now, she is a walking time bomb of abuse, ready to explode at any moment.
She is becoming ready to face what has happened to her. Carol Marie's
views of like, sanity, insanity, everything in her new world will be changed.
She will be torn with all kinds of doubts about her emerging reality."
"Enough said. Shall we resume our morning
rounds ladies." Dr. David said.
* * * *
The night shift had gone pretty smooth for Nurse
Bertha. Slowly and leisurely pushing the med cart, Nurse Bertha rounded
the corner. The only patient that needed meds at 2:00 A.M. was Carol
Marie. For some reason tonight, she had not done her nightly ritual.
Opening the heavy oak door of her room, Nurse Bertha saw Carol Marie.
Her puppet was no were to be seem. Usually it slept with Carol Marie
every night. Oh well she thought, maybe it was the presence of the
puppet that made Carol Marie act the ways she had been lately. Curiously
snooping around, Nurse Bertha heard that whimpering cry. The rod
iron bed structure began to rattle, slowly, then faster, then faster.
A blood curdling animal cry shrieked, Nurse Bertha stood frozen in time.
Horrified, she gathered her nerve-racked wits and slowly edged her way
towards the oak door. Before she reached it, from under Carol Marie's
bed sprang something.
"No! No! Noooooooooo..."
Nurse Bertha's wailing cries of help silenced and no more was heard.
* * * *
Dr. David pushed the security buzzer
for the third time. This was really odd, Nurse Berthe was usually
sitting at the end of the hall to let him in at 5:00 am every morning.
He wrestled around in his large, over packed, book bag. Finally he
fingers identified the keys. Unlocking the door and admitting himself,
Dr. David stood paralyzed. On the wall that lead to the elevator
was little red-hand marks, with splashes of large red coloring on the floor.
These images were like a map leading to the stairwell. Flowing the
marks, he smelt blood in the stair well. The trail stopped
outside the third floor. Hesitating, Dr. David carefully opened
the door. Looking from side to side, he proceeded into the hallway.
The only light shinning was the dim crack at the bottom of Carol Marie's
room. Heading towards the beam of light, he reached the door and
put his ear to listen for movement or voices. Inside she heard Carol
Marie crying and whimpering.
"Hush little Carol Marie now don't you cry.
Hush Carol Marie, don't you cry, Nurse Matilda Jacobs Nelson is going to
buy you a mocking bird. See, I know you did not hurt anybody.
It was I that killed my daddy Gerald Devils for being mean to me.
And Nurse Bertha, well she was my mother and would never protect or believe
me. She had to go. Now, were was I Carol Marie? Hush
little baby, now don't you cry..."
Doctor David opened the door, there sat Nurse
Nelson holding Carol Marie trying to give her of blood with motherly love.
* * * *
In the halls of St. Michael's a soft
lullaby can be heard in the early morning hours,
Hush little baby now don't you cry
Hush little baby now don't you cry
Hush little girlies, Matilda is going to bring you a
The great mystery behind St. Michael's
is finally solved. Dr. David's grandfather, Gerald, had sexually
abused his daughter Matilda, Nurse Nelson. She flipped out from the
abuse her mother (Nurse Bertha) and father did to her. In his quilt,
Dr. Gerald built St. Michael's to make all of it up to his
beloved, golden haired princess, Matilda.
The greatest thank you goes to Wanda and Peggy in Computer Services for
always being patient and fantastic! I would like to thank my Grandmother
Mary LeHew for giving me the gift of writing and the love for English and
Literature! The world's biggest thank you goes to my loving daddy,
Ken LeHew, who has always believed in me, no matter what! This man
is the greatest father in the world. I love him with all my heart!
Lastly, I thank Gary, my boyfriend, for being so supportive and understanding,
and for being my shoulder of support! A very special thanks to Norm and
Carol Stordahl, for the inspiration and guidance in my writing and always
listening to my stories through all the stages. Terry Heller, thank
you for you're teaching knowledge and support in this class! Without
these people in my life, I would not be were I am today! I AM WOMAN,
HEAR ME ROAR! I AM SHELLY, HEAR ME ROAR! Thank You Gary, I
Love You To The Ends Of The World And Back!