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Jessica Karminski

 Stanley The Feisty Stapler


When Larry bought a new trash can he went to the store expecting to find a normal trash can that he would use for trash. When he brought home the trash can he set it beside his desk and commented on how it matched with his room nicely. It was a black and silver striped can. The room was a darker grey with silver pinstripes down the walls. Larry was a lawyer that had a passion to be an author, he loved reading and admired any author that wrote a book. He decided to take a couple years off work to work on his first book. But before he could start on his dream he made a nice room in his house into his office for writing his book. Growing up Larry always focused on academics all throughout grade school and college, he was a lonely guy that didn't have many friends, but he didn't mind because he just wanted to focus on his goals in life. Being the lonely guy that he was, he gave names to almost everything that he used daily. For instance his coffee mug was named Mugly. His pen was Pluma, the stapler was Stanley and his bed was Ben. When he was deciding on the name for his trash can he came up with Dash. 

The next day when Larry was working in his office he threw the first piece of trash in the can; it was a salt water taffy wrapper that was all sticky and gooey, that had melted a little.

"Hey, watch it." Said the trash can

"What? Who said that?" Said Larry, being in his home office by himself. 

"Well who do you think it was, it's me Dash, and you got me all sticky now. Will you clean me off please?"

Surprised at what was happening Larry was speechless.

"Come on, clean me off" demanded Dash. 

Larry grabbed a tissue off his desk and began to wipe off the mess. But it was just making it worse because the tissue was falling apart sticking to the taffy. 

"Sorry, it's not working" said Larry, still a little stunned. 

"Well go get something else you dimwit. How would you like it if I threw something sticky in your face and just said sorry without trying to help you clean it off, especially if you didn't have any hands to clean it off yourself?" replied Dash.

Larry then went to go get a sponge and some soap and water, when he returned he looked at the trash can and asked it if this would be good enough. The trash can did not reply. At this point Larry was very confused, wondering if what just happened was real. He cleaned off the mess and attempted to return to doing his work. He tried to tell himself that it was just a dream and that he must have fallen asleep on his desk and dreamt the whole thing. 

Later that night, Larry was dozing off again, and he began to hear a small little voice say, "wake up, you need to get this work done." Larry thought that it was his conscience s being stronger than ever before, so he took a drink of his coffee that was in his mug named Mugly. 

"Wow, you really need to brush your teeth man."

"What who said that?" said Larry

"It's me, the one you are killing with that awful breath of yours" replied Mugly

Larry looked at the mug and felt like a fool. He was so confused and was not sure what was happening. This went on for days, with Larry thinking that he kept having these similar dreams while he was dozing off. Finally Larry asked, "Are you guys really talking?"

Dash replied, "well duh, stupid, what do you think is happening?"

"how, why, what? Why now? Why not before?

Mugly took this one, "well we could always talk, we just didn't want to in front of humans, but ever since you brought Dash home, we talked about it and we decided why not try talking to you, you seem pretty nice and friendly".

Larry was glad that they thought of him that way, but he was still confused. "Can everything talk?"

"Well," Pluma, the pen replied, "everything that humans give a name to can talk.

Larry was happy with that answer, but still felt a little insane for thinking that he could talk to objects just because he named them. So he tested it, he picked up his lamp on his desk and asked it what it thought, it did not reply, Dash interrupted Larry while he rejected what they all had just told him, "We can all talk, some of us just don't want to talk to you!". 

"Well, if everything that I name can talk, let's hear Stanley say something" 

"Why should I" came a feisty little voice, "ooops" 

"Well hey they Stanley, how's it going little guy?" Larry asked

"I don't have to tell you" Stanley snapped back, it seemed like he was trying to be this big tough thing when really he was just a little mini stapler. 

"Well, what did I ever do to you mister?" Larry asked in confusion for the aggressiveness. Dash told Stanley that it was okay to be nice to Larry and that Larry wasn't going to throw him away like his previous owner did, that is how Larry found Stanley, in an old thrift store that Larry often liked to visit now and then. Larry brought him home and sat him on his desk and named him Stanley. There was something special about this little stapler, just because he was little didn't mean anything to him. He had a special power, he could shoot staples out at 100 miles per hour. He was upset because he never got to use his power, and felt useless. Stanley hid this power from everything because he didn't want to be an outcast, the weird one that could do odd things. 

Eventually they all became friends and all the objects helped Larry out with his writing every day. Larry started with writing a long fictional novel, but all of his talking objects disagreed with his thought on the novel, instead they suggested that he write children stories. Larry was pleased with this idea, but was not sure how to start the children's stories. The objects helped him out and had him write about a lost dog finding its way home. Larry wrote the story and within a month of finishing it, it was published! Larry's objects helped him write several more children's books. 

Meanwhile while Larry was on his way back from getting a book published, his house was being robbed by two men who had observed Larry acting suspicious the last couple of months; they were men that had lived in the same neighborhood as Larry and had known him for years. They thought maybe Larry won the lottery or something because he was acting so happy all the time, instead of down and grouchy like he usually was. They figured they would break in his house and see what was causing Larry's happiness all of a sudden. They wanted to be happy too. 

When they broke in they heard some small little voices, and being the dummies that they were they went towards the voices not thinking anything could go wrong. They made their way down the hall towards the office and when they entered they heard a voice say "hey your not Larry" all of the objects knew that Larry was a lonely person and never had any visitors, they knew something was wrong. "get out of here! Who do you think you are just coming into people's houses that aren't your own, Now get the hell out!" Dash demanded. The robbers were not sure what was going on, they couldn't see anybody so they thought that Larry might have put some sort of recording device in the room to say that sort of thing if somebody did break in. The only thing was that the voice was not Larry's. The robbers looked around and couldn't find anything, so they just ignored it thinking it was a recording device that had been installed or something. They continued to snoop around. 

"That's it! Dash warned you!" Stanley said viciously. 

Pew, pew, Pew, the staples flung from Stanley the stapler right into the robber's forehead.

"Oww, what was that?" said the robber. "where did that come from?" 

Pew, pew, another two stables flew from Stanley and this time it pinned the robber's shirt to the wall. The other robber leaned over to go through Larry's desk, Mugly jumped up and spilled himself all over the robber, and the robber backed off. The other robber released himself from the wall and grabbed the stapler, unfortunately it was out of staples and could not fight back.

"Hey let go of me you doofus! Larry is not going to like this, Stop it Now!" Stanley struggled with pushing his handle and base together to try to pinch the robbers hand. The robber dropped him. "Oww" Stanley fell just right to where there was a staple laying on the ground, he loaded it himself and shot the robber at close range. 

"Oow! What the.."

Just then Ryan the Ruler jumped off the desk and started paddling the robber, it was a wooded ruler, so it did cause pain. "Hah! That's what you get for trying to hurt us!" said Ryan.

Then the robbers snatched up everything off of Larry's desk and threw it in a trash bag. They all struggled and cried out for help but it was hopeless. One robber kicked the trash can, Dash got mad and went off with his big mouth, so the robber crushed him and threw him in the bag too. When Larry arrived home he found his office had been ransacked and called the police. Larry broke down and cried, he could not believe that all of his friends were gone. He was extremely depressed, and could not find the will to write anymore. 

One day Larry was feeling more lonely than he ever had before, he decided to go to the store to buy another trash can and other office supplies. When he got home he named the items that he had bought but nothing happened, he tried talking to them but nothing ever responded. Larry's heart was broken, as well as his spirit for writing. As he laid in bed, he thought of one last story to write, it was dedicated to all of his talking items that had helped him come this far. It was based off of a struggling writer who has some desk top items that can talk to him and help him through his struggles. Larry finished this children's book after a few months, it was the longest that he had ever worked on a book. The publishers loved it and he won over one hundred different awards for this single book. He was so happy and was able to retire early. One day while shopping at the old thrift store Larry found his old things, like the dented trash can, and the old friend Pluma, even Mugly the mug; however, Mugly was so chipped and cracked that Larry didn't recognize him, it was just the feeling that Larry got when he saw the mug, he had to have it. He also found a mini stapler that reminded him of Stanley so he put that in his shopping cart too, even though it was bent and broken, and looked like it had been painted over with a woman's gold nail polish. When Larry got home he stared at the mug remembering Mugly, then picked up the stapler remembering Stanley, the stapler was chipping off and the black paint that it had been was showing through. Larry smiled, thinking of Stanley, the stapler smiled back and whispered "Larry, is it really you?" An overwhelming spirit of happiness spread through him, washing away his loneliness.

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